


I Can't Decide

by CaptainCassidy



Category: One Piece
Genre: DoflaCora, M/M, Murder, Sibling Incest, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-22
Updated: 2015-02-22
Packaged: 2018-03-14 11:49:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,162
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3409517
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CaptainCassidy/pseuds/CaptainCassidy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I can't decide<br/>Whether you should live or die<br/>Oh you'll probably go to heaven<br/>Please don't hang your head and cry<br/>I wonder why<br/>My heart feels dead inside<br/>Cold and hard and petrified<br/>Lock the doors and close the blinds<br/>We're going for a ride.</p>
<p>- Scissor Sisters</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Can't Decide

**Author's Note:**

> It's not very long, but I hope you enjoy it. ;n;

  
__

_It's not easy having yourself a good time.  
Greasing up those bets and betters  
Watching out they don't four-letter._

　　  
　　He hated waking up like this. Alone, in a cold sweat, and teeth ground so hard his jaw ached. Getting up was a bitch, but it was so much easier than going back to sleep, wasn’t it? When he was awake, everything was his to manipulate, and no one had any true power over him; after all, could a puppet ever overpower his puppeteer? No, they were tied to his strings, and would bend to his will.  
　　The blonde man dressed himself quickly, realizing he’d overslept with a bitter snarl. Had he delayed his own plans for the day? Perhaps not, as the sun was not high in the sky and he could hear very little activity about his ship. What were they doing? Just because he wasn’t there to keep an eye on them didn’t mean they could slack off. He’d be certain to make his rounds in a different order, just to throw the other pirates off and remind them to keep on their toes.  
　　Tugging on his feathery coat, Doflamingo quickly strode to the door, throwing it open and scaring the unexpected guest on the other side something terrible. The other tripped back over himself, the over-exaggerated expression of shock on his makeup-covered face making for a comical scene before the feared pirate. Poor thing, he’d almost had a heart-attack.  
　　The other recovered rather quickly, sitting up but refraining from actually trying to stand. Blue eyes stared back at him, obscured by shaggy blonde locks that were much longer than his own. Had he come out here to check if his big brother was alright? What a cute, cute younger sibling he was. What was he to do without him?  
　　  


__  
_Fuck and kiss you both at the same time._  
　　 _Smells like something I’ve forgotten_  
　　 _Curled up, died, and now it’s rotten._  
　　

  
　　Of course he’d come to see him. The sight of the much weaker Donquixote distracted him from his duties for a moment, the elder leaning down to tug his kid brother to his feet. They were only two years apart, but Rocinante had always been like a needy child, clinging to his big, strong older brother like a security blanket until their separation after he’d murdered their father and taken his head back to the Celestial Dragons. What had little Roci been doing all that time? Had anyone else come close to him, tried to take Doflamingo’s place, made him feel good like he had? The thought made him mad with jealousy.  
　　There were things to do today, weren’t there? Did they really demand his attention right now? Surely they could wait a little while longer, if only so that he could spend a bit of time with his concerned, precious sibling. Yes, they could wait, just for a short while. His Corazon deserved his attention right now.  
　　“Did you come out here to check on me?” Doflamingo asked, pulling Roci close to him by the back of his head and planting a careful kiss on his forehead. What a cute, cute younger brother he had. Even now, Corazon’s face was reddening, as if he wasn’t used to this attention. Such a shy boy he is, and always was. What would he do without him? He certainly wouldn’t have this feeling of fondness, reserved only for this one person. Without that, he would be a real monster, wouldn’t he?  
　　The younger brother nodded, looking up at his elder. Rocinante was only a few inches shorter than him, but it was just enough to make him have to tilt his head skyward to look him straight in the eyes. It was adorable, and Doflamingo’s smirk widened. He leaned forward again, hand still on the back of Roci’s head, and pressed a kiss to the red-painted and scarred lips.  
　　What a lovely shade of red he’d turned. Was he really still so shy? This had been going on for as long as Doffy could remember, and yet his little brother was still so skittish about it. Did he still worry about someone seeing them? It wasn’t as if the crew didn’t already know. Rocinante was his, this fact he’d made clear the moment he’d rejoined him in his travels.  
　　Speaking of, he still knew very little of what had happened to the poor thing during their separation. Whatever it was, it must have been truly awful if he would no longer speak, even to his charismatic and loyal big brother. Whoever had done that to him best be dead, least they wished to spend the rest of their lives tormented by the master of strings.  
　　Whatever, Roci would tell him when he was ready. He could wait until then; Doflamingo owed him that much, at least. For now, he was happy just to have his precious younger sibling back.  
　　  


__  
_I'm not a gangster tonight_  
 _Don't want to be a bad guy_  
 _I'm just a loner baby_ _And now you've gotten in my way._

　　Turning Corazon into a breathy mess beneath him always brought a broad grin to his face, his lips curling up and nearly stretching from ear to ear. Did those little gasps count as noises? Surely they did, for they were music to the elder’s ears. What other sounds could he get the other to make? Perhaps he could make him talk again, if he tried hard enough? Oh, the mere thought was delightful.  
　　His still-smiling lips grazed over the sensitive flesh of Roci’s neck, pausing to gently nip and suck just under his jaw. He’d always liked that, and it seemed that even after so many years, nothing had changed. What a cute sibling he was, writhing beneath Doffy as he worked their erections together from beneath their clothes. How sweet he looked, forcing his eyes closed and biting back as many of those delicious little noises he could, going so far as to muffle himself with the pillow.  
　　What would he do without his cute, cute younger brother?  
　　  


__  
_I can't decide_   
_Whether you should live or die._   
_Oh, you'll probably go to heaven_   
_Please don't hang your head and cry._   
_No wonder why_   
_My heart feels dead inside_   
_It's cold and hard and petrified._   
_Lock the doors and close the blinds_   
_We're going for a ride._

　　Gone again, just as soon as he’d had him back. What a noble heart, for him to take Law and search for a cure for the poor, doomed boy. Did he really think he could save him? Had he really become that attached to the kid? The thought made him jealous.  
　　What a time to leave, just as he was preparing to give his little brother a truly glorious gift. The Ope Ope no Mi was just within their reach, and such a powerful Devil Fruit could go to no one else besides his precious younger sibling. Such power was reserved for the one person he cared for the most, the one who relied on him and would never betray him.  
　　And yet, a sinking feeling in Doflamingo’s stomach told him something was very, very wrong. Surely he was just over thinking things, though, wasn’t he? After all they’d been through, it wasn’t surprising that he would assume the worst, was it?  
　　  


__  
_It's a bitch convincing people to like you._   
_If I stop now call me a quitter_   
_If lies were cats you'd be a litter._   
_Pleasing everyone isn't like you_   
_Dancing jigs until I'm crippled_   
_Slug ten drinks I won't get pickled._

　　The “charismatic devil” was more than just a nickname already; it was who he would become, who he always had been. Still, it taxed his psyche to smile in the light of everything, and now, not even that shield could be raised. A frown to match his grin stretched across his face, turning his usually sharp features into knives that promised harm and cruelty.  
　　Was there a way out? Could he be redeemed, could he be saved? In every scenario, it ended the same; his status would be lost, and Rocinante would betray him again. So, there was only one thing to do, wasn’t there? No drug, no drink, no man or woman would ever mend the parts of him that shattered into spiderweb pieces, falling to the ground at his feet where he would simply step on them and grind their remains to dust. Nothing would bring him back from what he knew he had to do.  
　　  


__  
_I've got to hand it to you_   
_You've played by all the same rules._   
_It takes the truth to fool me_   
_And now you've made me angry._

　　Had his cute little brother finally bared his fangs at him? Surely there was an explanation behind what was happening, wasn’t there? Did he think stealing the Ope Ope no Mi would impress him? Did he think it would save Law? What made him think he had the right to make the choice!? How dare Rocinante go against him, how dare he try and run from the one person who loved him and had kept him close, despite everything!  
　　Oh, but there was worse to come. Doflamingo’s eyes and heart was ablaze, rage burning in his core as he caged the island and followed the trail leading to his younger sibling. What a sad, sad sight he was; and then, he was saddened further. Was that a gun? Was Roci raising a gun to his own brother? Why? He’d given him everything, his love, his devotion, his protection, and this was how the younger would repay him?  
　　  


__  
_I can't decide_   
_Whether you should live or die._   
_Oh, you'll probably go to heaven_   
_Please don't hang your head and cry._   
_No wonder why_   
_My heart feels dead inside_   
_It's cold and hard and petrified._   
_Lock the doors and close the blinds_   
_We're going for a ride._

　　Bloody, useless, broken, and beaten, Rocinante spoke to him, in a voice that seemed so far from what he had known. Sorry? Sorry didn’t begin to cover what he had done, and though his face and posture was stone still, his insides writhed and screamed like a wild animal caught in a cage. Was this cage of his own making? No, that was nonsensical. Doflamingo had done nothing wrong. He was giving the world what it deserved, building his own way back to royalty and crushing all those who had defied them. Who besides him deserved the status of “just” and “noble” more than he? After all he’d been through, all he had seen, all he had done just to be standing here, in the snow, holding a gun loaded with lead bullets up to his brother’s head.  
　　Another trial? Was another trial really needed, after everything he’d been forced to endure!? First father was a fool, then mother was ill, and then he’d lost Roci. He’d gotten him back, but at what cost? His younger sibling’s life? Was Rocinante really going to make the same mistake their father had made? Was he really so soft, so foolish?  
　　Betrayal was not tolerated among the Donquixote Pirates. Everyone knew this, even his precious baby brother. His cute, cute little brother... Would have to be punished, wouldn’t he? There was no escaping what he’d done, and never could his heart recover from being torn from the only thing he truly cared about.  
　　A shame, a damn shame. What would he do without him?  
　　  


__  
_Oh I could throw you in the lake_   
_Or feed you poisoned birthday cake._   
_I wont deny I'm gonna miss you when you're gone._   
_Oh I could bury you alive_   
_But you might crawl out with a knife_   
_And kill me when I'm sleeping._   
_That's why..._

　　One shot was all it took, he knew. One bullet to break him completely, his own hand pulling the trigger to his own demise. Was it bad that the cold feeling encasing him numbed the anger and sadness? Was it wrong that he simply turned away and left, doing nothing for the body of his beloved younger brother? Had he made the right choice, with all he’d done in his life?  
　　A tragedy, but he hadn’t the time to bother with the dull throb of his aching heart. His fate was sealed now, he knew, and nothing could change that. Was this what he had wanted? For himself, for his brother, was this worth it? Surely it was, or else fate would not have placed this challenge before him. What a cruel bitch she was, unable to leave him alone for even a second.  
　　What would he do without his cute, cute brother?  
　　  


__  
_I can't decide_   
_Whether you should live or die._   
_Oh, you'll probably go to heaven_   
_Please don't hang your head and cry._   
_No wonder why_   
_My heart feels dead inside_   
_It's cold and hard and petrified._   
_Lock the doors and close the blinds_   
_We're going for a ride._


End file.
